Perfectionism.

I have a problem (as if I have only one problem!): I wait for everything to be perfected. I am ready to contribute any measure of my energy to achieve perfection in anything I do. This includes handling of mails, medical records, bills, other important documents, bible study, prayer, order of house hold items and the list goes on.

I think I should give few examples:

1. Unless there is a 'perfect' plan, I hesitate to do things such as travel, barbecue, picnic... (My perfectionism usually ruins the fun.)
2. Normal schedule/timings of daily life has to be planned and executed as planned.
3. Spending of money.
4. Disciplining kids and wife (!).

You get the picture. I am a control-freak! The irony is I hate other control-freaks!

This spirit of perfectionism demands my mind, peace, time and energy.

I love the way Jesus dealt with the messy people, but I find myself failing to donate my time towards something which is not in my 'schedule'. I want to visit some people, but if it messes my normal life schedule, I hesitate.

One thing I know for sure, this spirit is not of God. Because God says, 'do not worry about tomorrow'. Live one day at a time. Do not be anxious. Live in the present moment. I do this some times but then I fall into the stinking perfectionism again...aaarg!