Unstable

I have been unstable in dealing with people who do not receive the message of Grace. Hatred is easily aroused in me towards them and I know that shouldn't be the case.I see them as prideful as they don't receive it. I know that my intention shouldn't be to convert a person to my thinking pattern. My intention shouldn't be to force this message on someone, no matter how deeply I care for them.
It is the 'controlling spirit' which tells me to control people. It is the perfectionist spirit which takes the graceful tolerance from me. Am I growing upward or downward? Sometimes I wonder, where is my so called maturity? Why would I think arrogantly that I can love people irrespective of their beliefs? Why am I not able to leave the 'results' totally unto God?