I find it so difficult to love certain type of people - the people who are selfish, self-righteous, and those who do double talk. It’s funny that I am not free from any of these yet I find it hard to love others when I see them executing these characteristics. I know, who is NOT selfish? Who is not broken? But I keep forgetting it. We can all come together in our brokenness. I need Jesus in the same way the most selfish person on earth needs Him. I am no different. I did nothing differently to gain His acceptance in the first place. But I still struggle to accept others.
I do believe that God loves me unconditionally, but struggle to believe that God love others also unconditionally. Which means, I fail to see God’s love for what it is. Otherwise, why wouldn’t I love people no matter how they are?
Within me, I have no ability to love. If at all there are any traits of love in me, it’s Him. I am learning this lesson and it’s hard. I am sitting here and trying to generate love towards the people I hate. God is love, but Bino is not love. He loves people, not me. When He loves people through me, it appears as though I am loving, but it’s Him.
I believe any love or act of love which isn’t from God is not love at all. I get frustrated when I can’t love. And I think it’s better not to show love than faking it up. It deceives both parties.
I want to love but sometimes I can't and the resolution I am reaching at is that this occurs when I live outside the truth. Because the truth is that the personification of perfect love lives in me and as I learn to live according to this truth I would be able to exhibit love, even to the difficult people. But it seems too far now.
Showing posts with label Love of God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love of God. Show all posts
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Monday, November 17, 2008
Sharing the message
Should we enforce behavior change? Should we enforce morality? Should we condemn their sins BEFORE we tell them that they are forgiven by the death of Jesus on the cross? Should we become a political power (vote bank) to enforce morality in the world? Should we march against abortionists and gays in order to tell them that God loves sinners?
I think evangelism (or sharing gospel or sharing the love of Jesus) is more than instructing people 'how to escape hell'. One of the biggest hindrance a person can have to come to a point where he realizes he need need Jesus, is his pride. And God opposes the proud. Trying to scare those people with the idea of hell (or rejection by God) or condemning them by their behavior wouldn't necessarily humble them and bring them to a point that they are ready to give up all their efforts/beliefs/unbelief and surrender to Jesus.
People are very skeptical in nature and reluctant to give up something they believe or not believe in order to come to faith in Jesus. So, the question is should we use scare tactics or some kind of emotional force or judgment of their behavior or rebuking of their immorality to shake their heart and bring them to Christ?
Amy over her blog made an excellent statement about this:
When you decide it is your job to force others into truth, you prove by doing so that you think too highly of yourself and too lowly of the Truth.
In other words, when we are forcing people to buy the message we are trying to sell, we are being skeptical about the power of the message itself, the power of Truth. So, we put our efforts to make it happen and most likely we end up using scare tactics, emotional manipulation or even threatening voice because we do not believe in the power of love in the first place.
I am yet to see a life genuinely transformed (inside-out) through fear, but I have seen and experienced unbelievable transformations in people's lives through the power of love. Love never fails!
The other day I came across on a verse in the book of Romans:
Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance? - Romans 2:4
It is when we tell people about the kindness, mercy, grace and love of God, they come to repentance. It's not the other way around, that we use scare tactics to get them to Christ. That usually offend them or probably shut them off. Remember, people are extremely prideful to give up something they always believed (For example: religion) or they never believed. Love humbles people whereas fear and manipulation put them in confusion.
We can consistently point people to the love of God displayed on the cross and that will eventually (as we are being consistent in showing them the love of God through Christ) humble them and ultimately bring them to Christ.
What changed the life of the woman caught in adultery? The judgment of the people who were going to stone her or the love and kindness of Jesus?
I think evangelism (or sharing gospel or sharing the love of Jesus) is more than instructing people 'how to escape hell'. One of the biggest hindrance a person can have to come to a point where he realizes he need need Jesus, is his pride. And God opposes the proud. Trying to scare those people with the idea of hell (or rejection by God) or condemning them by their behavior wouldn't necessarily humble them and bring them to a point that they are ready to give up all their efforts/beliefs/unbelief and surrender to Jesus.
People are very skeptical in nature and reluctant to give up something they believe or not believe in order to come to faith in Jesus. So, the question is should we use scare tactics or some kind of emotional force or judgment of their behavior or rebuking of their immorality to shake their heart and bring them to Christ?
Amy over her blog made an excellent statement about this:
When you decide it is your job to force others into truth, you prove by doing so that you think too highly of yourself and too lowly of the Truth.
In other words, when we are forcing people to buy the message we are trying to sell, we are being skeptical about the power of the message itself, the power of Truth. So, we put our efforts to make it happen and most likely we end up using scare tactics, emotional manipulation or even threatening voice because we do not believe in the power of love in the first place.
I am yet to see a life genuinely transformed (inside-out) through fear, but I have seen and experienced unbelievable transformations in people's lives through the power of love. Love never fails!
The other day I came across on a verse in the book of Romans:
Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God's kindness leads you toward repentance? - Romans 2:4
It is when we tell people about the kindness, mercy, grace and love of God, they come to repentance. It's not the other way around, that we use scare tactics to get them to Christ. That usually offend them or probably shut them off. Remember, people are extremely prideful to give up something they always believed (For example: religion) or they never believed. Love humbles people whereas fear and manipulation put them in confusion.
We can consistently point people to the love of God displayed on the cross and that will eventually (as we are being consistent in showing them the love of God through Christ) humble them and ultimately bring them to Christ.
What changed the life of the woman caught in adultery? The judgment of the people who were going to stone her or the love and kindness of Jesus?
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
"Buddy god"?
You are promoting an "Easy believism", a "buddy god" or a "teddy bear god". This is the perversion of our ancient Christian doctrines, teachings and traditions. This is blasphemy! Are you saying that we just simply need to 'believe' and everything is hunky-dory?
Have you ever heard this before? If not, you will most likely face this question at least once in your lifetime.
My quick answer to this question would be something like this: well, it's better than promoting an angry, wrathful, sadistic, ready-to-whack, fire-spitting, terrorizing God and scare people away from Him!
I am not sure why people think that believing is so easy. It has never been easy for me. I tried to find the counterfeit for belief through religion for many many years. It took so many years for me to come to a place where I realized that I need to give up all my self-efforts to please God through any other means other than believing in His provision of free righteousness.
Adam & Eve failed to believe. Abraham failed to believe. Moses failed to believe. Israelites failed to believe. So why do we think believing is so easy? It's the hardest thing on the face of the earth, but at the same time it's the simplest thing on the face of the earth! Don't ask me why. It's just the way it is. Humans always find it easy to do and earn than to believe and trust. But that doesn't mean that there is an alternative to believing or should we add some of our works to it.
Do we need BIG faith to believe?
Jesus said, 'faith in the size of a mustard seed' would do wonders. What matters is the sincerity of the heart. Jesus said, 'unless you become like these little children...' It's a ruthless trust (as Brennan Manning calls it). Trusting God without apology. Sometimes, I even get scared of seeing the kind of trust my children put on me. It's a sincere, honest, merciless trust - indicating "no matter what as long as it's my Dad, I am going to jump into his hands."
Do they trust me because I am their 'buddy Dad'? Or do they trust me because they know that I am trustworthy and faithful?
Isn't that knowing what gives us the unbelievable, supernatural ability to trust God for who He is? It comes from an understanding of His love for us. We can't muster up faith. It's the love what produces faith, not the other way around.
Yes, we love Him because He is trustworthy and His love displayed on the cross has proved it. We don't love him because he is a 'buddy god' or 'puppet god' or a provider of 'cheap greasy grace'.
He is the God of the universe, who created everything seen and unseen, including the things which we can't even comprehend with our finite mind, by the word of His mouth. But while being such a powerful God, He sent His one and only son Jesus to die on our behalf so that our true humanity can be restored; and displayed the utmost act of love ever been revealed in the history of the planet earth. So, BELIEVE HIM, He is trustworthy, faithful and His love NEVER fails!
Have you ever heard this before? If not, you will most likely face this question at least once in your lifetime.
My quick answer to this question would be something like this: well, it's better than promoting an angry, wrathful, sadistic, ready-to-whack, fire-spitting, terrorizing God and scare people away from Him!
I am not sure why people think that believing is so easy. It has never been easy for me. I tried to find the counterfeit for belief through religion for many many years. It took so many years for me to come to a place where I realized that I need to give up all my self-efforts to please God through any other means other than believing in His provision of free righteousness.
Adam & Eve failed to believe. Abraham failed to believe. Moses failed to believe. Israelites failed to believe. So why do we think believing is so easy? It's the hardest thing on the face of the earth, but at the same time it's the simplest thing on the face of the earth! Don't ask me why. It's just the way it is. Humans always find it easy to do and earn than to believe and trust. But that doesn't mean that there is an alternative to believing or should we add some of our works to it.
Do we need BIG faith to believe?
Jesus said, 'faith in the size of a mustard seed' would do wonders. What matters is the sincerity of the heart. Jesus said, 'unless you become like these little children...' It's a ruthless trust (as Brennan Manning calls it). Trusting God without apology. Sometimes, I even get scared of seeing the kind of trust my children put on me. It's a sincere, honest, merciless trust - indicating "no matter what as long as it's my Dad, I am going to jump into his hands."
Do they trust me because I am their 'buddy Dad'? Or do they trust me because they know that I am trustworthy and faithful?
Isn't that knowing what gives us the unbelievable, supernatural ability to trust God for who He is? It comes from an understanding of His love for us. We can't muster up faith. It's the love what produces faith, not the other way around.
Yes, we love Him because He is trustworthy and His love displayed on the cross has proved it. We don't love him because he is a 'buddy god' or 'puppet god' or a provider of 'cheap greasy grace'.
He is the God of the universe, who created everything seen and unseen, including the things which we can't even comprehend with our finite mind, by the word of His mouth. But while being such a powerful God, He sent His one and only son Jesus to die on our behalf so that our true humanity can be restored; and displayed the utmost act of love ever been revealed in the history of the planet earth. So, BELIEVE HIM, He is trustworthy, faithful and His love NEVER fails!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
The ABC’s of salvation
Next to the main entrance of the church we attended few years ago, there was a table and a stack of fliers on it. It was a one page printout titled ‘ABC’s of salvation’, and below the title, the subsequent lines explained what it means.
A – Accept
B – Believe
C – Confess
To elaborate,
A – Accept you are a sinner.
B – Believe in Jesus.
C – Confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord.
Do these three steps – You are saved!
Wow!
There were references to bible verses with each step. When I first saw it, I was fascinated by the simplicity of the salvation formula derived from a big book like Bible. I took one copy for myself thinking that I might use this formula to get others saved. I had never seen it simplified like this before. The reason I was fascinated, that my finite brain is always inclined to the ideologies listed as bullet points. It’s easy to read, grasp, teach and share. Also I like the exact ‘science’ of anything.
Now, here is the question I want to pose:
What are the things you need to believe or do in order to fall in love with a girl?
Here is my answer,
1. Get to know her
2. ---------
3. ---------
Hmm… There is no exact science! I don’t know how to put it into bullet points! Love is not a set of statements defined on a piece of paper. There are things which cannot be explained, there are things which cannot be put into words. There are no step 1, 2, 3…There are no schools on the face of the earth who can teach me the science of falling in love.
Isn’t it amazing that we shortened the 66 books of the Bible into few bullet points hoping that we are summarizing it exactly? Has Jesus ever given us a formula? Has the Apostles?
Isn’t salvation nothing but falling in love with Jesus? And isn’t it true that the way I fall in love is NOT the way you fall in love?
How come we reduced this amazing love of God into a step by step process?
1. Listen to a sermon
2. Respond to the altar call
3. Repent of your sins
4. Invite Jesus into heart
5. Pray Sinner's prayer
6. Fill out the decision card
7. Join a church
8. Get baptized in their water by their pastor
9. Seek the gift of tongues (if you are a Charismatic)
10. Submit to the authority of your pastor and believe and do everything he says until your last breath.
What if the salvation is none of these? What if salvation is simply accepting a gift of love from the creator of the universe? What if Bible is not a book of ideologies, but a love letter?
Yes, I admit I am tempted to make everything into an exact science. But that's because I am dumb! Let ever my dumbness negate the essence and beauty of the love of Jesus!
When I itemize the steps for getting saved and staying saved, I am missing the whole point – the whole point of love. It might make my evangelism easier. It might help me to succeed in my Systematic Theology class. But what is the point if I am missing the love? What ideology can truly transform a heart other than genuine love?
I find it increasingly difficult to explain love, grace, faith, hope etc. People look for formulaic answers, but I just don't have it. I mean, I might just say - "I know Jesus loves you; and I hope you will come to know this truth." Is it over-simplified? I don't know!
A – Accept
B – Believe
C – Confess
To elaborate,
A – Accept you are a sinner.
B – Believe in Jesus.
C – Confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord.
Do these three steps – You are saved!
Wow!
There were references to bible verses with each step. When I first saw it, I was fascinated by the simplicity of the salvation formula derived from a big book like Bible. I took one copy for myself thinking that I might use this formula to get others saved. I had never seen it simplified like this before. The reason I was fascinated, that my finite brain is always inclined to the ideologies listed as bullet points. It’s easy to read, grasp, teach and share. Also I like the exact ‘science’ of anything.
Now, here is the question I want to pose:
What are the things you need to believe or do in order to fall in love with a girl?
Here is my answer,
1. Get to know her
2. ---------
3. ---------
Hmm… There is no exact science! I don’t know how to put it into bullet points! Love is not a set of statements defined on a piece of paper. There are things which cannot be explained, there are things which cannot be put into words. There are no step 1, 2, 3…There are no schools on the face of the earth who can teach me the science of falling in love.
Isn’t it amazing that we shortened the 66 books of the Bible into few bullet points hoping that we are summarizing it exactly? Has Jesus ever given us a formula? Has the Apostles?
Isn’t salvation nothing but falling in love with Jesus? And isn’t it true that the way I fall in love is NOT the way you fall in love?
How come we reduced this amazing love of God into a step by step process?
1. Listen to a sermon
2. Respond to the altar call
3. Repent of your sins
4. Invite Jesus into heart
5. Pray Sinner's prayer
6. Fill out the decision card
7. Join a church
8. Get baptized in their water by their pastor
9. Seek the gift of tongues (if you are a Charismatic)
10. Submit to the authority of your pastor and believe and do everything he says until your last breath.
What if the salvation is none of these? What if salvation is simply accepting a gift of love from the creator of the universe? What if Bible is not a book of ideologies, but a love letter?
Yes, I admit I am tempted to make everything into an exact science. But that's because I am dumb! Let ever my dumbness negate the essence and beauty of the love of Jesus!
When I itemize the steps for getting saved and staying saved, I am missing the whole point – the whole point of love. It might make my evangelism easier. It might help me to succeed in my Systematic Theology class. But what is the point if I am missing the love? What ideology can truly transform a heart other than genuine love?
I find it increasingly difficult to explain love, grace, faith, hope etc. People look for formulaic answers, but I just don't have it. I mean, I might just say - "I know Jesus loves you; and I hope you will come to know this truth." Is it over-simplified? I don't know!
Monday, June 9, 2008
Mysterious love
Considering the mysteries of godliness, in a sense, I am an agnostic.
The truth regarding Christ and the salvation He offers (the mystery of gospel) has been revealed. I agree. But the mysteries of unanswered prayers, fleshly desires, pain, sickness, tragedies, the extend of God’s love, fore-knowledge, prophecies, spiritual gifts etc. are puzzling. I have tried to come-up with dogmatic explanations on these subjects but was never satisfied intellectually. As I pursued answers, I found more questions. So, eventually, just to keep my proper dogmatic religious position, I bypassed, ignored, and rejected the difficult questions. I started disliking those questions and the people who asked them. Questions scared me!
Grace taught me a new thing: It is perfectly alright to have unanswered questions.
So, now after much struggle with my brain, I am kind of satisfied with the unanswered questions surrounding spirituality. And, by doing so, the mystery is always alive in my heart and at the same time, I am not anxious about all the answers. “I don’t know” is my answer to many of these questions.
I think that is the point. Love overtakes mysteries. Love soothes troubled hearts, not so much with the answers, but with the peace which surpasses the abilities of human brain. God’s love satisfies our curiosity in a mysterious (there that word again!) way. I don’t know how, but I know that it is a fact. I am at peace with my questions. I still have thousands of them, but I am not afraid.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. (1 Corinthians 13:2)
Love answers all the questions! Knowledge without love is meaningless. Love allows us to have questions. Love is not scared. Love can answer them all! ... in a mysterious way!
The truth regarding Christ and the salvation He offers (the mystery of gospel) has been revealed. I agree. But the mysteries of unanswered prayers, fleshly desires, pain, sickness, tragedies, the extend of God’s love, fore-knowledge, prophecies, spiritual gifts etc. are puzzling. I have tried to come-up with dogmatic explanations on these subjects but was never satisfied intellectually. As I pursued answers, I found more questions. So, eventually, just to keep my proper dogmatic religious position, I bypassed, ignored, and rejected the difficult questions. I started disliking those questions and the people who asked them. Questions scared me!
Grace taught me a new thing: It is perfectly alright to have unanswered questions.
So, now after much struggle with my brain, I am kind of satisfied with the unanswered questions surrounding spirituality. And, by doing so, the mystery is always alive in my heart and at the same time, I am not anxious about all the answers. “I don’t know” is my answer to many of these questions.
I think that is the point. Love overtakes mysteries. Love soothes troubled hearts, not so much with the answers, but with the peace which surpasses the abilities of human brain. God’s love satisfies our curiosity in a mysterious (there that word again!) way. I don’t know how, but I know that it is a fact. I am at peace with my questions. I still have thousands of them, but I am not afraid.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. (1 Corinthians 13:2)
Love answers all the questions! Knowledge without love is meaningless. Love allows us to have questions. Love is not scared. Love can answer them all! ... in a mysterious way!
Friday, April 25, 2008
The real Jesus and real people
I have a high respect towards those who choose to live a monastic way of life, isolating themselves from the world for seeking spiritual truths. I am not saying all of them are genuine cases, some may be influenced by hallucinations and mistake it as truth. During my teenage years and early twenties, I wanted to go to the mountains and write poems. I wasn’t really ‘spiritual’ but I always had a tendency to be alone. Solitude can be very soothing and refreshing to me (even today). Jesus took time to withdraw Himself from the crowd and Bible says, early in the morning He went to the mountains to pray.
To me, that is a dream. I have no such luxury in life (at least as of now). I am consistently tossed back and forth between work, home, bills and problems. Apart from few isolated moments of spirituality, I have nothing much to claim that I have experienced the presence of God. The feelings such as no enough prayer, no enough Bible reading are so very common in life and to be honest I feel guilty about it some time. The other day my wife asked me if I have ever felt that God directly speaking to me. Well, I had to think hard to remember at least one occasion.
I understand how monks can be spiritual. But, can the rest of us be spiritual? Can I be spiritual when I have a leaking basement, unpaid bills and a car with transmission problems? What about those who have mentally challenged kids, teenagers with behavioral problems, old age parents, life threatening sickness, divorce issues, disabilities, addictions and condemning church members? Can they be spiritual?
I am talking about real people with real problems. The messy, rejected and depressed. I am not talking about those who appear as if they have figured everything out in life. I am not talking about those super religious, extraordinary, disciplined, "church potato"s. I am talking about the people who are messed up in life and in need of rescue. I am talking about the people who agree that they do not experience the presence of God in their life, no matter how hard they try. I am talking about the people who have been ridiculed by the ‘super religious’ saying that the cause of their problems are their lack of faith. Can they be spiritual?
The answer is YES. Those are the kind Jesus need. He came for the sick and He hanged out with such kind. The kind of people society rejects – sinners, lepers, blind, prostitutes, tax collectors, homeless, weary and laden…
He went to the midst of them, loved, hugged and supped with them. He wasn’t doing the ‘extraordinary’ charity, it was normal to Him; He loved the messy, weary and heavy laden. Folks, this is what gives me hope, that He can love me right in the midst of all my nonspiritual, unworthiness.
He loves me even when I am devastated in the crowded busyness of my life. He loves me right through my unbelief, sins and bad temper. There is nothing I can do to stop Him from loving me. I can boast in His love because it is solid, unwavering and unshakable. I can't help but thank Him for the of the rest of my life.
I am tired of listening to those double talking, rigid hearted, hypocritical, judgmental pharisees. I am sorry, I am only interested in real people. Don't come to me with a lie that I need to get all my acts clean for Jesus to love me. I am not interested in such a 'made up', 'religious' Jesus. I want the real Jesus, the Jesus whom the Bible proclaims!
I am convinced that there is hope for any sinner. Jesus forgave those who killed Him; and believe me you aren't as bad as them. Our messiness has value in the sight of God (and only in the sight of God). The problems, confusion, questions we face have value in the sight of God. In EVERYTHING, even in our sins, He works for our good.
"Everything--great, small, important, unimportant, distant, and near--has its place, its meaning, and its value. Through union with Him...nothing is wasted, nothing is missing. There is never a moment that does not carry eternal significance--no action that is sterile, no love that lacks fruition, and no prayer that is unheard." - Brennan Manning
He sees the desires of our heart, the desire to get out of the mess we are in and He respect that desire, not necessarily by pulling us right out of it, but by loving us right through it...
To me, that is a dream. I have no such luxury in life (at least as of now). I am consistently tossed back and forth between work, home, bills and problems. Apart from few isolated moments of spirituality, I have nothing much to claim that I have experienced the presence of God. The feelings such as no enough prayer, no enough Bible reading are so very common in life and to be honest I feel guilty about it some time. The other day my wife asked me if I have ever felt that God directly speaking to me. Well, I had to think hard to remember at least one occasion.
I understand how monks can be spiritual. But, can the rest of us be spiritual? Can I be spiritual when I have a leaking basement, unpaid bills and a car with transmission problems? What about those who have mentally challenged kids, teenagers with behavioral problems, old age parents, life threatening sickness, divorce issues, disabilities, addictions and condemning church members? Can they be spiritual?
I am talking about real people with real problems. The messy, rejected and depressed. I am not talking about those who appear as if they have figured everything out in life. I am not talking about those super religious, extraordinary, disciplined, "church potato"s. I am talking about the people who are messed up in life and in need of rescue. I am talking about the people who agree that they do not experience the presence of God in their life, no matter how hard they try. I am talking about the people who have been ridiculed by the ‘super religious’ saying that the cause of their problems are their lack of faith. Can they be spiritual?
The answer is YES. Those are the kind Jesus need. He came for the sick and He hanged out with such kind. The kind of people society rejects – sinners, lepers, blind, prostitutes, tax collectors, homeless, weary and laden…
He went to the midst of them, loved, hugged and supped with them. He wasn’t doing the ‘extraordinary’ charity, it was normal to Him; He loved the messy, weary and heavy laden. Folks, this is what gives me hope, that He can love me right in the midst of all my nonspiritual, unworthiness.
He loves me even when I am devastated in the crowded busyness of my life. He loves me right through my unbelief, sins and bad temper. There is nothing I can do to stop Him from loving me. I can boast in His love because it is solid, unwavering and unshakable. I can't help but thank Him for the of the rest of my life.
I am tired of listening to those double talking, rigid hearted, hypocritical, judgmental pharisees. I am sorry, I am only interested in real people. Don't come to me with a lie that I need to get all my acts clean for Jesus to love me. I am not interested in such a 'made up', 'religious' Jesus. I want the real Jesus, the Jesus whom the Bible proclaims!
I am convinced that there is hope for any sinner. Jesus forgave those who killed Him; and believe me you aren't as bad as them. Our messiness has value in the sight of God (and only in the sight of God). The problems, confusion, questions we face have value in the sight of God. In EVERYTHING, even in our sins, He works for our good.
"Everything--great, small, important, unimportant, distant, and near--has its place, its meaning, and its value. Through union with Him...nothing is wasted, nothing is missing. There is never a moment that does not carry eternal significance--no action that is sterile, no love that lacks fruition, and no prayer that is unheard." - Brennan Manning
He sees the desires of our heart, the desire to get out of the mess we are in and He respect that desire, not necessarily by pulling us right out of it, but by loving us right through it...
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Approval Addiction - Overcoming
I have realized and convinced that no matter how spiritual people are, they can still be trapped under any kind of addiction. But the good news is that there is hope. The root cause of approval addiction is believing error. Jesus said, the truth will set you free; so the opposite should also be true: error will put us under bondage. Approval addicts are evidently under the bondage of error. They have learned a pattern from the world, from their own past, from other people, during the many years of their life and apparently believe that it is their actions or behavior what makes them acceptable to people and God. The hope is found in Jesus, when we put faith in Him, He makes us a new creation. Our true being is regenerated by God and He gives a brand new spirit; our way of life would change from outside-in to inside-out. The rest of the life we will go through a process of learning to walk by faith in the Spirit who dwells in us. To me, though I have started my Christian life many years ago, I didn't really believe the unconditional love, total forgiveness and total acceptance of God. There is a big difference in knowing and believing and believing the truth is the key to beat approval addiction.
Acceptance by God
It is not enough to know the love of God; do we believe that God loves us and accepts us as we are (messed up, weak and sinful)? Are we ready to believe what God says about us?
Self Acceptance
Knowing and believing the acceptance by God lead us into self acceptance; which contributes to self esteem. As we start accepting ourselves we tend to judge us less and less. One of the key verses which convinced me that we shouldn't be judging ourselves is this:
But [as for me personally] it matters very little to me that I should be put on trial by you [on this point], and that you or any other human tribunal should investigate and question and cross-question me. I do not even put myself on trial and judge myself. - 1 Corinthians 4:3
Why wouldn't Paul care others judgment? Why wouldn't he judge himself? There was One who was judged on his behalf. The lamb of God was judged, ridiculed and crucified on our behalf; He became sin for us by hanging on the tree to take our sins away from the eyes of God, never to see them again. In Him, we have the total approval of God. Knowledge of this truth is what gave Paul the confidence to say the above statement. Not only he knew it, but believed it, which enabled Him to say one of the startling statements in the Bible: 'For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.'
Paul's past failings did not make him a failure. In fact, God used his past to advance His kingdom among Gentiles. God can use our past for His purposes. Paul talked about his weakness in Romans 7, but he offered it to God and God used him mightily. Let's start believing what God says and let's stop listening to the lie Satan tries to induce into our mind. Renewing our mind with truth is the way to replace the lie we have believed for a long time.
Paul said, "I would not allow anything to control me" (1 Corinthians 6:12). He made this statement right after making one of the most controversial statements in the Bible: "Everything is permissible". Everything is permissible because we are totally free from the law. But Paul wouldn't misuse that freedom to allow anything to control him. He wouldn't allow him to be addicted to anything. I wouldn't believe he conjured up that strength by his own energy; but his total dependence and total confidence in Christ is what strengthened him. It is knowing that we are weak and His strength comes in full in our weakness is what makes us strong. His power is made perfect in our weakness. Lets not be afraid when the Light shows us our weaknesses; lets not run away from it; instead lets be truthful and bring it unto God and offer it to Him.
God separates what we do from who we are. We are identified with Christ and it is our identity what makes us who we are, not what we do. As we start believing it, we enter into His rest where we can be at ease, not performing to gain acceptance, but totally resting from all our works and snuggling into His lap and enjoying His acceptance.
Ephesians 4:15 encourages us to 'speak truth', and James encourages us to 'confess our sins to each other'. If we do not agree that we have an addiction, it would be hard to deal with it. Speaking the truth and confessing to each other will allow us to be healed from the wounds we all carry in our hearts. It is the understanding of our acceptance by God is what makes us to be truthful. Being truthful is nothing but living without a mask. I am not saying it is easy, but it is possible. We are sealed with a seal of approval in Holy Spirit, which is the guarantee of our hope. No matter how hard we try, it still wouldn't be enough to satisfy the people around us. They will need more and more, demanding all our strength and eventually we will burn out. Such consumerism is what we see around us, and we can only stand in the middle and wonder how we are going to satisfy all their demands. Well, the truth is we can't, and we will never be able to. So, quit trying.
The epidemic of insecurity in our life can only be dealt by God. In Him we can be totally secured, fearless and totally loved. Our deep need for love, acceptance and approval is fulfilled in Him, and no human can never ever satisfy that to the full. The foundation for our security is knowing who we are in Christ, accepting His unconditional love, and accepting ourselves as we are. Remember, we are referred to as believers, not achievers. What ever needed to be achieved was achieved by God once for all of us, now we need to only believe.
If we believe the error that we are "an old, rotten sinner", then we will just keep sinning and sinning because what we do comes out of our "who" - out of who we believe we we are. We need a "righteousness consciousness", not a "sin consciousness".
Be relaxed
Stop being against yourself just because Satan is against you! Let's join with Apostle Paul saying "I do not put myself on trial and judge myself". We can be relaxed in Christ because He called us into a 'rest'. We can be gentle on ourselves thinking the right thoughts. Proverbs says, "For as he thinks in his heart, so is he". We need to renew our mind (thoughts) in accordance with God's thoughts about us, then we will see the victory over the approval addiction. I wouldn't expect this to happen over night, but it is a process. Today, I can very well say that I am not where need to be, but thank God I am not where I used to be.
[Resources]
1. Victory over Depression - how to live above your circumstances by Bob George is the best bet. Though I haven't read that book by myself, I have heard the testimonies of others and guarantee that there are a lot of truth in it.
2. Approval Addiction - Overcoming Your Need to Please Everyone by Joyce Meyer. To be honest, I am not a big Joyce Mayer fan. In fact I do not agree with everything in the book. My wife bought this book a long time ago, read it and gave a great feedback. But my skeptical nature didn't allow to pick it up. But couple of weeks ago, I didn't have anything else to read and I picked this one. Now I am glad I did it. I was amazed by the fact that she gives so much emphasis on our identity in Christ. I really don't know everything she teaches but this book is great and it will certainly help those who struggle with the issue of people pleasing.
Acceptance by God
It is not enough to know the love of God; do we believe that God loves us and accepts us as we are (messed up, weak and sinful)? Are we ready to believe what God says about us?
Self Acceptance
Knowing and believing the acceptance by God lead us into self acceptance; which contributes to self esteem. As we start accepting ourselves we tend to judge us less and less. One of the key verses which convinced me that we shouldn't be judging ourselves is this:
But [as for me personally] it matters very little to me that I should be put on trial by you [on this point], and that you or any other human tribunal should investigate and question and cross-question me. I do not even put myself on trial and judge myself. - 1 Corinthians 4:3
Why wouldn't Paul care others judgment? Why wouldn't he judge himself? There was One who was judged on his behalf. The lamb of God was judged, ridiculed and crucified on our behalf; He became sin for us by hanging on the tree to take our sins away from the eyes of God, never to see them again. In Him, we have the total approval of God. Knowledge of this truth is what gave Paul the confidence to say the above statement. Not only he knew it, but believed it, which enabled Him to say one of the startling statements in the Bible: 'For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.'
Paul's past failings did not make him a failure. In fact, God used his past to advance His kingdom among Gentiles. God can use our past for His purposes. Paul talked about his weakness in Romans 7, but he offered it to God and God used him mightily. Let's start believing what God says and let's stop listening to the lie Satan tries to induce into our mind. Renewing our mind with truth is the way to replace the lie we have believed for a long time.
Paul said, "I would not allow anything to control me" (1 Corinthians 6:12). He made this statement right after making one of the most controversial statements in the Bible: "Everything is permissible". Everything is permissible because we are totally free from the law. But Paul wouldn't misuse that freedom to allow anything to control him. He wouldn't allow him to be addicted to anything. I wouldn't believe he conjured up that strength by his own energy; but his total dependence and total confidence in Christ is what strengthened him. It is knowing that we are weak and His strength comes in full in our weakness is what makes us strong. His power is made perfect in our weakness. Lets not be afraid when the Light shows us our weaknesses; lets not run away from it; instead lets be truthful and bring it unto God and offer it to Him.
God separates what we do from who we are. We are identified with Christ and it is our identity what makes us who we are, not what we do. As we start believing it, we enter into His rest where we can be at ease, not performing to gain acceptance, but totally resting from all our works and snuggling into His lap and enjoying His acceptance.
Ephesians 4:15 encourages us to 'speak truth', and James encourages us to 'confess our sins to each other'. If we do not agree that we have an addiction, it would be hard to deal with it. Speaking the truth and confessing to each other will allow us to be healed from the wounds we all carry in our hearts. It is the understanding of our acceptance by God is what makes us to be truthful. Being truthful is nothing but living without a mask. I am not saying it is easy, but it is possible. We are sealed with a seal of approval in Holy Spirit, which is the guarantee of our hope. No matter how hard we try, it still wouldn't be enough to satisfy the people around us. They will need more and more, demanding all our strength and eventually we will burn out. Such consumerism is what we see around us, and we can only stand in the middle and wonder how we are going to satisfy all their demands. Well, the truth is we can't, and we will never be able to. So, quit trying.
The epidemic of insecurity in our life can only be dealt by God. In Him we can be totally secured, fearless and totally loved. Our deep need for love, acceptance and approval is fulfilled in Him, and no human can never ever satisfy that to the full. The foundation for our security is knowing who we are in Christ, accepting His unconditional love, and accepting ourselves as we are. Remember, we are referred to as believers, not achievers. What ever needed to be achieved was achieved by God once for all of us, now we need to only believe.
If we believe the error that we are "an old, rotten sinner", then we will just keep sinning and sinning because what we do comes out of our "who" - out of who we believe we we are. We need a "righteousness consciousness", not a "sin consciousness".
Be relaxed
Stop being against yourself just because Satan is against you! Let's join with Apostle Paul saying "I do not put myself on trial and judge myself". We can be relaxed in Christ because He called us into a 'rest'. We can be gentle on ourselves thinking the right thoughts. Proverbs says, "For as he thinks in his heart, so is he". We need to renew our mind (thoughts) in accordance with God's thoughts about us, then we will see the victory over the approval addiction. I wouldn't expect this to happen over night, but it is a process. Today, I can very well say that I am not where need to be, but thank God I am not where I used to be.
[Resources]
1. Victory over Depression - how to live above your circumstances by Bob George is the best bet. Though I haven't read that book by myself, I have heard the testimonies of others and guarantee that there are a lot of truth in it.
2. Approval Addiction - Overcoming Your Need to Please Everyone by Joyce Meyer. To be honest, I am not a big Joyce Mayer fan. In fact I do not agree with everything in the book. My wife bought this book a long time ago, read it and gave a great feedback. But my skeptical nature didn't allow to pick it up. But couple of weeks ago, I didn't have anything else to read and I picked this one. Now I am glad I did it. I was amazed by the fact that she gives so much emphasis on our identity in Christ. I really don't know everything she teaches but this book is great and it will certainly help those who struggle with the issue of people pleasing.
Monday, December 3, 2007
A short vacation.
It is hard to believe that a 15 days vacation was a short one!
But when it includes 38+ hours of flight journey, a wedding, reception, visiting relatives on both sides, kids being sick and staying in the hospital, it is really short!
My 17 months old son couldn’t really cope with a sudden change in temperature (From 35 degrees to 96 degrees in 24 hours). I wouldn't blame him!
While traveling from one side of the globe to the other squeezing in the economy class seat, I was dreaming about the comfort of my bedroom all the way.
Though still in jet lag (waking up at 3.00 in the morning), I am glad I am back!
All I want to say is that, though I didn’t have good sermons, bible study, blogging, churching, the peace of Christ was upon me all the time! All the 15 days while going through many difficult times, I knew I was a child of God.
I didn’t feel guilty for not praying, for not reading bible, for not churching. Somewhere deep inside me I knew that I was loved unconditionally!
Thank You, Jesus!
But when it includes 38+ hours of flight journey, a wedding, reception, visiting relatives on both sides, kids being sick and staying in the hospital, it is really short!
My 17 months old son couldn’t really cope with a sudden change in temperature (From 35 degrees to 96 degrees in 24 hours). I wouldn't blame him!
While traveling from one side of the globe to the other squeezing in the economy class seat, I was dreaming about the comfort of my bedroom all the way.
Though still in jet lag (waking up at 3.00 in the morning), I am glad I am back!
All I want to say is that, though I didn’t have good sermons, bible study, blogging, churching, the peace of Christ was upon me all the time! All the 15 days while going through many difficult times, I knew I was a child of God.
I didn’t feel guilty for not praying, for not reading bible, for not churching. Somewhere deep inside me I knew that I was loved unconditionally!
Thank You, Jesus!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ...
The question which the gospel of grace puts to us is simply this: Who shall separate you from the love of Christ?
What are you afraid of?
Are you afraid that your weakness could separate you from the love of love of Christ?
It can't.
Are you afraid that your inadequacies could separate you from the love of love of Christ? They can't.
Are you afraid that your inner poverty could separate you from the love of love of Christ? It can't.
Difficult marriage, loneliness, anxiety over the children's future? They can't.
Negative self image? It can't.
Economic hardship, racial hatred, street crime? They can't.
Rejection by loved ones or the suffering of loved ones? They can't.
Persecution by authorities, going to jail? They can't.
Nuclear war? They can't.
Mistakes, fear, uncertainties? They can't.
They gospel of grace calls out: Nothing can ever separate you from the love of God made visible in Christ Jesus our Lord.
You must be convinced of this, trust it, and never forget to remember. Everything else will pass away, but the love of Christ is same yesterday, today, and forever. Faith will become vision, hope will become possession, but the love of Jesus Christ that is stronger than death endures forever. In the end, it is the only thing you can hang onto. - Brennan Manning (The Ragamuffin Gospel)
What are you afraid of?
Are you afraid that your weakness could separate you from the love of love of Christ?
It can't.
Are you afraid that your inadequacies could separate you from the love of love of Christ? They can't.
Are you afraid that your inner poverty could separate you from the love of love of Christ? It can't.
Difficult marriage, loneliness, anxiety over the children's future? They can't.
Negative self image? It can't.
Economic hardship, racial hatred, street crime? They can't.
Rejection by loved ones or the suffering of loved ones? They can't.
Persecution by authorities, going to jail? They can't.
Nuclear war? They can't.
Mistakes, fear, uncertainties? They can't.
They gospel of grace calls out: Nothing can ever separate you from the love of God made visible in Christ Jesus our Lord.
You must be convinced of this, trust it, and never forget to remember. Everything else will pass away, but the love of Christ is same yesterday, today, and forever. Faith will become vision, hope will become possession, but the love of Jesus Christ that is stronger than death endures forever. In the end, it is the only thing you can hang onto. - Brennan Manning (The Ragamuffin Gospel)
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