Monday, November 12, 2007


I have been unstable in dealing with people who do not receive the message of Grace. Hatred is easily aroused in me towards them and I know that shouldn't be the case.I see them as prideful as they don't receive it. I know that my intention shouldn't be to convert a person to my thinking pattern. My intention shouldn't be to force this message on someone, no matter how deeply I care for them.
It is the 'controlling spirit' which tells me to control people. It is the perfectionist spirit which takes the graceful tolerance from me. Am I growing upward or downward? Sometimes I wonder, where is my so called maturity? Why would I think arrogantly that I can love people irrespective of their beliefs? Why am I not able to leave the 'results' totally unto God?


Kimberley said...

I was just browsing through blogs and found this post. People not accepting the grace of God is out of your control. If you sew the seed then God will reward you for that. You have done what He's asked! He knows exactly what is going to happen in other peoples lives and if they are going to accept Him or not. Send up prayers. That helps me to accept the fact that the Lord is in control and I am not.

Daelon said...

I have the exact same difficulty. I've tried to force it onto my friends without any love in it. I simply wanted them to be more like-minded.

2 weeks ago I was preaching grace to my friend simply to convert him and not at all out of love. I felt like complete crap after I did that. Then I understood why Paul said, "I can have all knowledge and understand all mysteries, but if I do not have love, I am nothing."

Sometimes it's better to remain silent and put on our legalism filter. I wish I could say I had perfected this. I do believe it is necessary to soak in grace and truth before we go out to battle. I believe the more we know the truth of grace, we will be less provoked to anger when people reject it or contradict it.

I know the main reason for my anger is fear. Fear that people will make me afraid and thus make me start questioning my salvation again. This provokes anger in me and I tend to shy away from the person who arouses the fear in me by legalism.

Joel Brueseke said...

Wow, thanks for being so open and honest about this. The "grace pharisee" in me has reared its ugly head all too many times as well.

Sometimes I have been very surprised by how patient I've been with people, but sometimes I'm very ticked at myself for being so impatient and for expecting others to see things my way.

It helps me to remember back to some of the legalistic ways I used to think, and to remember that it was only God's revelation to me that caused me to see more clearly. In our latest podcast, I recalled a time in my life when I used to quote Old Covenant promises and say, "SEE... some of God's promises are conditional. You have to do YOUR part before God will do HIS part!"

I totally took the Bible out of context, but I was dead serious about how this was the way a Christian needed to live their life in Christ!

Remembering things like this does help me to be more patient with others, but I have to admit that even after a dozen years of growing in grace, that controlling spirit still edges its way in sometimes.

Bino B. Manjasseril said...


Welcome to my blog! Thank you for visiting and your comments are so appreciated. You said it right, we can sow and maybe even water it, but not to make it grow. Thats is God's territory. And when I look back to my own life, I ignored this truth for almost 30 years! God still did not leave me. And finally when it came to due time (to the end of myself, my efforts, my doing) He got my attention and it has been great ever since. Now, that same fact should remind me of being patient with those who still struggle to get the truth of the Gospel. Thanks again for your encouragement.

Bino B. Manjasseril said...


I am so moved my your honesty on this matter. Thank you for sharing it.

I know the main reason for my anger is fear.

There you hit the root cause. Thats is the problem. Bible says, perfect love casts away fear. Now I can see that I am still at the rear end of this perfect love. I have a lot more 'growing' on the way in the coming days. I think the important thing is to be teachable. Thats my prayer, make me teachable, no matter how painful it is let me learn from it.

Bino B. Manjasseril said...


I can very well relate to what you are saying about quoting the 'conditional' promises. The fact is I still sometimes fall in to the 'conditional' things once in a while especially towards unbelievers. There was a good post by graceforlife
on "Do We Need To Preach the Law To Preach The Gospel?"
I still don't know the answer. This is something I struggle with. Paul says, law is a 'tutor', so my question is should we still use law as a 'tutor' for unbelievers? to show them they are sinners?

lydia joy said...

Wow, I can so relate, I too have been struggling with this -it can be very draining. On the one hand you just want them to have the same freedom and joy as you and on the other you want to expose legalism for what it is -what a fine line to walk!! I am asking God to tell me what to say, when to say and help me chill out and get a grip -there is grace for them where they are at and more grace availabe when their eyes are opened -pray that their eyes and hearts be opened, and hang in there - !!

Bino B. Manjasseril said...


Thank you for stopping by and writing those words of encouragement. I think it is okay to give some room for them to 'catch' the truth on their own pace. As Joel once said, Grace cannot be 'taught' but it has to be 'caught'. I believe that. Though it is frustrating to us, God is never frustrated!