Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Why religion? Just why?

When I lived in the walls of institutionalized church, I felt as if I was holding a fragile glassware up on my finger tip all the time, balancing it with extreme care so that it won’t fall down and break. It was like a circus. All my energy had been used to balance the glassware, so my growth was stunt.

My every strength was consumed for the ‘defense’ against temptations (falling).

I thought if call my ‘secular’ friends, I might fall into sin or talk ungodly talks, so I purposefully avoided meeting/talking with my friends of ‘pre-IC’ era.

I avoided some of my office get-togethers’ just because those were done in bar restaurants. I thought, what if I get tempted to drink alcohol?

I stayed away from smokers. What if I get tempted to smoke cigarettes?

I closed my nose to avoid smell of some good food. What if I get tempted to eat while I am fasting?

I stayed away from 'worldly' people. What if I get an 'influence' from them?

I never felt secured in the love of God. Never! So I was always trying to hold this glassware (religion) up so that I can feel a false security. Some of the things in it were: do not mingle with unbelievers, do not drink alcohol, do not smoke, do not look at woman, do give tithes, do vote conservatives, keep strict 'christian' boundaries (whatever that means), stand against 'evil doers', always look for ways to witness to everyone you ever encounter, etc

I could never live loved. There wasn't even a shred of freedom in that life. Religion shrank my heart.

Insecurity and fear were the two things driving me all the time.

I was afraid, if I let the thing I am holding fall down, god would whack me and throw me straight to hell.

Fear was my motivation to hold it up all the time.

I never grew up; there wasn’t any room for growth. All the resources were used to ‘keep the lights on’ or in other words, to 'keep the mask on'.

Now I am asking why? Why religion? For what purpose? Let that glassware fall down and break! Let those things roll on the floor! Let those shackles be shattered, and you soar up like the eagles of righteousness... Let no religion, in any way or form, hold you down!

12 comments:

Amy said...

Bino,
Great post! Indeed, I too, while living the institution went around trying to portray what I had believed was looking like a "good Christian." I, also, never darkened the door of a bar if a friend asked, never touched a cigarette, or drugged (not saying that I want to now). They were "no-no's." Yet, I didn't DO them because I knew the Love of Papa for me. I did them because the "rules" said it was bad/immoral to do them.

Now, it's totally different. I do not abuse (note I say abuse here. I still have an occasional glass of wine-although I don't smoke, nor ever have done drugs nor want to) substances BECAUSE I know Papa Son Holy Spirit's love for me, NOT because I'm trying put on a mask of "The Perfect Christian Woman."

This particular post of yours reminds me much of Darin's most recent post titled "The Command to Witness." Did you get the inspiration from it?

In any case, great thoughts here!

Blessings,
~Amy :)

RJW said...

Why religion? Because since the Fall from our identity in the garden, men have been deceived into thinking that they are responsible for, if not restoring, at least MAINTAINING their relationship with God.

Living by faith requires the abandonment of all logic as we know it. That is why the cross is foolish to those who are perishing. That is why Grace is so offensive. How dare it not BE ABOUT US??? But it isn't. The Father covenanted with the Son, NOT US!!

We just get to believe, accept, and LIVE!!!

Good News! GOOD NEWS!!

Peace, Bino. :)

Joel B. said...

Ahhh the good ol' days of walking on eggshells, trying so hard to get it all "right," sometimes thinking I'd gotten it right but most of the time wondering if I ever would really get it right!

Yep, something that was not of me or God was inside telling me there was something other than the finished work of Jesus that could ever make me completely and perfectly accepted in Him.

If I just stayed away from certain people or activities, or if I just tried harder and other activities, with the 'right' people, then I'd be able to avoid and overcome temptation.

The good news was only good news when I was getting it right! How sad.

Thank God for the truth of the life of Christ in us!

Bino M. said...

Amy - Thanks!

Jamie - I agree. Thanks!

Joel - Yes, if you are honest to your religion, it certainly is a tiring work! I was honest in my efforts, so I got tired!

theoldadam said...

Jesus said, "My yoke is easy."

What yoke?

The yoke around our neck that is religion.

Jesus smashed it, destroyed it, obliterated it on the cross...once and for all.

Trouble is. We just don't believe it. So we get on our high horses and give it our best effort and Jesus holds His nose at the basket of filthy rags that we hold up to Him.

Bino M. said...

Steve - Well said!

Leonard said...

Thanks and keep reminding me.

jul said...

Well, why not? I think you did a great job of explaining that! Great post.

Bino M. said...

Leonard, Jul - Thank you!

Free Spirit said...

Bino,
I SO wish that I couldn't relate to that!

Very well said, my friend.

Amazing what we see now that the blinders are off!

lionwoman said...

It seems I need many doses of reminder of the fact that yes, grace is grace. Not "grace and..." as taught in IC. Sort of a New Testament law system. Thank you for another reminder :-)

Bino M. said...

FS - Yes, the removing of the veil makes a world of difference. Thank you!

LW (Amy) - Thank you!