Aquarium fishes

We had 4 fishes in our small kiddie aquarium and one of them died yesterday because Smita fed them too much and the food and their poop raised the mercury content in the water. So I had to do an emergency clean up yesterday so that we can keep the other three alive.

I think many Christians are like aquarium fishes - they look beautiful in the tank but you have to keep them alive by providing them a comfortable environment, right amount of food, clean water, clean filter, right temperature etc. They can't survive even a small change in the settings. They are very delicate.

Now, consider the fishes in the ocean. Their survivability is much higher because they are in the wild and they know how to cope with wilderness.

They are not in the tank.

In the tank, there is no much room for error because tank is very confined. A confined environment get contaminated soon.You over feed them or under feed them, they will die in both cases. You disrupt the nitrogen cycle in the tank, they will die.

You change the order, style or time of the service, many will leave. Because they immediately become uncomfortable. They need the cycle to be continued without disruption, they need to be fed with the right amount of food. You take the bottle out of their mouth and give them steak, they will die due to indigestion. Since they are not in the wild, they don't hunt for food themselves. So you appoint a feeder, usually a pastor. His job is very stressful because the lives of the inhabitants of the tank is now in his hands.

He keep giving them a pattern to follow and as long us they are in that comfort zone they are alive and would look great from outside. But don't jump into the tank deceived by their beauty. Its so hard to get out of the tank. The tank is usually in a temperature controlled living room. It's an artificial environment. It's not real. You can only entertain others showing your external beauty but you will never experience the wildness (natural state).

Fishes are not created for tanks!

As long as they are in the tank their life depends on the caretaker and the artificial environment.

Free them, then they will learn to live in the wild, in the freedom. They will swim in the depth and vastness of the ocean. They will develop immunity to fight problems, enemies. They will learn to discern. They will start using their own mind. They will dump the law of the tank and embrace the freedom of the grace. You don't need to spoon-feed the fishes which are in the wild. Because they are now living like their Creator intended them to live.

Why religion? Just why?

When I lived in the walls of institutionalized church, I felt as if I was holding a fragile glassware up on my finger tip all the time, balancing it with extreme care so that it won’t fall down and break. It was like a circus. All my energy had been used to balance the glassware, so my growth was stunt.

My every strength was consumed for the ‘defense’ against temptations (falling).

I thought if call my ‘secular’ friends, I might fall into sin or talk ungodly talks, so I purposefully avoided meeting/talking with my friends of ‘pre-IC’ era.

I avoided some of my office get-togethers’ just because those were done in bar restaurants. I thought, what if I get tempted to drink alcohol?

I stayed away from smokers. What if I get tempted to smoke cigarettes?

I closed my nose to avoid smell of some good food. What if I get tempted to eat while I am fasting?

I stayed away from 'worldly' people. What if I get an 'influence' from them?

I never felt secured in the love of God. Never! So I was always trying to hold this glassware (religion) up so that I can feel a false security. Some of the things in it were: do not mingle with unbelievers, do not drink alcohol, do not smoke, do not look at woman, do give tithes, do vote conservatives, keep strict 'christian' boundaries (whatever that means), stand against 'evil doers', always look for ways to witness to everyone you ever encounter, etc

I could never live loved. There wasn't even a shred of freedom in that life. Religion shrank my heart.

Insecurity and fear were the two things driving me all the time.

I was afraid, if I let the thing I am holding fall down, god would whack me and throw me straight to hell.

Fear was my motivation to hold it up all the time.

I never grew up; there wasn’t any room for growth. All the resources were used to ‘keep the lights on’ or in other words, to 'keep the mask on'.

Now I am asking why? Why religion? For what purpose? Let that glassware fall down and break! Let those things roll on the floor! Let those shackles be shattered, and you soar up like the eagles of righteousness... Let no religion, in any way or form, hold you down!

ivescrewedup

I am so moved by the multitudes that are forced to wear a mask due to the fear of religious judgment. What good the religion is doing in their life other than forcing them into depression?
I came across this website which allows people to confess their sins anonymously. It’s no a wonder that they open up under the title of ‘anonymous’. The world and the religion wouldn’t allow them to open up authentically. It’s not that we have to make all our secret sins public, but what if we have a group of people where we could confess to each other without the fear of judgment?
I think millions are dying in guilt, shame and fear due to many sins in their life. If we can stop acting that everything is hunky-dory in our life just because we are Christians, wouldn’t that be a lot better?

We, Christians are well known for the fact that we preach the salvation by grace through faith alone. We attract people telling them, no matter how sinful they are, they are still worthy for the salvation offered by Christ. They come with a lot of excitement and joy. Once we know that now they are ‘converted’, then we start giving the list of things they should be doing and the list of things they shouldn’t be doing. We preach the ‘finality of the cross’ with one side of our mouth and then preach the ‘biblical principles’ through the other side and we find pleasure in controlling people using law.

If we act as if we have got all our acts clean, how can we expect the real people to come and share their struggles with us? It is sad that we don’t realize the law causes us to lose our authenticity. But grace causes us to be real and blunt. In grace, there is humility, understanding, compassion and true love. In law, there is only pride, guilt, fear and punishment. What good is that? Still we like to be called as ‘law keepers’, people with ‘principles’ etc.

Jesus said ‘It’s finished’. But standing at the foot of His cross, we are telling people, “No, it’s not finished, you have to work on your sins”. Does Jesus lead us to holiness or does holiness lead us to Jesus?
When Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing’, how much holy were those people whom He was addressing? How many sins the thief on the cross cleaned up for him to hear something like this from Jesus: “Today you will be with me in paradise”?

Jesus’ Gospel is supposed to be a ‘good’ news but didn’t the religion make it into ‘bad’ news?

Rethinking 'Church'

When God started to make things clear to me (or when I finally started to listen to Him) about His unconditional love and grace, my first reaction was over-reaction. I was angry at the religion. I wanted to ask those who deceive the people with legalism, why they do that? I wanted to fight the heresy they teach. I was annoyed by the processed sermons they preach. I became intolerant towards legalism. I wanted to be in the middle of it and fight it. I tried, tried and tried. I was treated as someone deceived by a ‘bad theology’. I was told that ‘grace alone’ is dangerous. I was asked to read the ‘what we believe’ page of their website. I was a subject of their prayer, so that God’s wrath won’t fall up on me. I was told that the New Covenant is a continuation of Old Covenant. Finally it came to a point where either they will excommunicate me, or I should stop fighting. Then finally I left by my own.

Like Aida said in her blog, grace really is disruptive . It made my life upside down. It made disruption in my own life and in the life of the ones around me. It is so very difficult to hide the grace of God.

Sure enough, I wasn’t mature enough to take it lightly about fighting legalism with my own energy. I felt deceived for many years. I was seeing church as an entity where people workout in a spiritual gymnasium. I thought, without such a place to ‘work out’ we become nonspiritual. I couldn't think of a spiritual life without it. There I have seen people who think the church-potatoes are more spiritual. People who think skipping a meeting is a sin. Everybody operating on the basis of fear while struggling to put up a peace smile on their faces. People who fear demons, pastors, unbelievers and pretty much everything other than the ones in their own ‘sect’. Sorry if it sounds like a cult. It's not intentional.

The question is should we fight it? I think there is a difference in fighting legalism and opposing legalism. Fighting can produce reformation but ultimately the result could be just another system. We don’t want to replace one system for another. I respect the historical reformations but at the same time wondering if it just erupted another system. Instead of Cathedrals, now we have churches (assemblies, chapel, etc). I am tempted to fight it but it could also mean that it is still controlling me. Fighting could be a sign that I am still in it. Shouldn't we just rest in the all sufficiency of His grace? And if legalism come in our way, just oppose it? I don't mean being inactive. In fact I have never seen a person who is walking in grace being inactive.

'Systems' are generated from fear and it tries to give people a false sense of security. But if there is a bit of fear, the love is not perfected. We can’t perfect in love, unless we see the One who loved us while we were yet sinners.

Systems/Organizations miss the majors and they end up concentrating on the minors. One of the most wonderful Bible study advice I have ever received is – majoring in majors as opposed to majoring in minors. Minors such as building, music, dress, programs, meetings, committees as opposed to the majors such as Jesus, Grace, Faith, Love, Hope, Forgiveness, Acceptance, Discipleship.

Is it time to rethink church? Is it time to rethink community? Is it time to rethink fellowship? Does it have to be organized? Does it have to be planned? Does it have to be formal?

In a hard way I am learning that we can be spiritual without the organ playing and lights dim. I was so used to it and it required a lot of unlearning. I am still in the process of unlearning. Religion has such a power to bind us. It never ever ever can set us free. Music don’t set us free, programs don’t set us free, miracles don't set us free,... But it is THE truth that truly set us free!

I am no more bound in the four walls of religion. Thank you Jesus! I am in a risky ocean of Grace. Yes it is risky, disruptive, dangerous but it is worth taking that risk. Not that I was courageous to take such a risk, but it was Him doing it, it was Him who showed me His radical grace, it was Him who loved me perfectly while I was still a sinner. There is a lot more to explore in this great ocean, there is excitement, there are wonders and miracles. (Warning:There is also pain involved in the process of walking by faith). But it is sweet, it is so freeing, it is so securing in His love. Are you ready to dive in, leaving the securities of your religion?

Double talk

I have lived the 'double talk' in Christianity for sometime without even realizing it. Religion has lot of power that it mesmerizes us to think everything it teaches is right. James 1:8 tell us that a double-minded man is unstable in all he does. I was one like that. The guilt, fear and shame it produced was unimaginable. The following are some of the things I have observed in the Christian religion. The idea is not to bash things but to share the amazement.

Isn’t funny that we tell people that Christ died to take away their sins, and tell them how to confess them?
Isn’t funny that we tell people to go where ever God leads them, and then telling them where to go?
Isn’t funny that we tell people that God is love, and tell them how to ‘earn’ His love?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people that salvation is not by works, and teach the ‘steps’ to be saved?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people that Gospel is all about Jesus, and explains them things to ‘do’ to be saved or stay saved?
Isn’t it funny that we teach people from New Testament, and ignore the significance of New Covenant?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people that the curtain was torn from top to bottom, and still build tabernacles?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people that we can call God, Abba Father, and teach them to mug up prayer?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people that God is omniscient, and then tell them to pray to change God’s mind?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people to call God our Father, and refer to Him as God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob?
Isn’t it funny that we teach people that we are under a New Covenant, and then teach them to tithe?
Isn’t it funny that we teach people to tithe, and then serve them pork for dinner?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people to read 2 Cor 3:7-11, and fight for public display of 10 commandments?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people that Holy Spirit is our teacher, and still busy building seminaries?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people that the church is the body of Christ (group of believers), and invite them to a building calling it ‘church’?
Isn’t it funny that we tell people that we are under Grace, and teach them law?
Isn’t funny that we tell people that Christ came seeking sinners not the righteous, and bash sinners?
Isn't it funny that we teach people that what matters to God is not the education but the heart, then hire only seminary graduates?
Isn't it funny that we tell people that Jesus's disciples were poor, then tell them to pray for prosperity?
Isn't it funny that we tell people that Jesus used uneducated to change the world, and put M.Th and M.Div at the end our names?
Isn't it funny that we tell people that they are free in Christ, and then bash them for not obeying the law?
Isn't it funny that we tell people that money is evil, and pray to bless them financially?
Isn't funny that we tell people that we cannot serve mammon and God at the same time, and inviting them to testify about the 'financial miracle'?
Isn't it funny that we tell people that sinners are welcome to our 'church', and bash them with law?
Isn't it funny that we tell people to be like 'Bereans' (Acts 17:11), and then excommunicate them if they question?

Religion Vs. True Grace

Church loving – People loving
Pastor loving – Jesus loving
Church praising – God praising
Giving 10% - Give in ‘free will’
Control others using law – Proclaim that the law is fulfilled in Christ
Not questioning anything – Challenge law and legalism under new covenant
Showing off love – Sharing genuine love
Bashing sinners – Tell them Christ took away all their sins once-for-all
Evangelizing everybody – Proclaim the unconditional love of God to those who are ready to listen
Trying to convert people using law, guilt and fear – Trying to show people love, grace and freedom in Christ
Being active in church programs – Being active in ‘growing in Grace’
Being social – Being who we are
Bound but acting free - Free and acting free
Showing off Bible knowledge – Knowing Bible for what it means, not what it says
Being busy – Walk by faith
Acting holy – Being holy

The Shack

This is one book that genuinely going beyond the surface of Christian spirituality. It easily made in to my list of favorite books. Some of the conversations between Mack (the hero of the story) and God stirs up thoughts and challenges the norm of religion. It is healing, challenging, questioning, encouraging and refreshing. We have nothing to offer to God but He offers everything to us, His children. God is not necessarily a noun, but a verb - the great 'I AM'. Here are some snippets of the conversations between Mack and God (Papa, Jesus and Sarayu):

"My life was not meant to be an example to copy. Being my follower is not trying to 'be like Jesus', it means for your independence to be killed. I came to give you life, real life, my life. We will come and live our life inside of you, so that you begin to see with our eyes, and hear with our ears, and touch with our hands, and think like we do. But we will never force that union on you. If you want to do your thing, have at it. Time is on our side."

"So many believe that it is love that grows, but it is the knowing that grows and love simply expands to contain it. Love is just the skin of knowing."

"I have been talking to you for a long time, but today was the first time you could hear it, and all those other times weren't a waste, either. Like little cracks in the wall, one at a time, but woven together they prepared you for today. You have to take the time to prepare the soil if you want it to embrace the seed."

"Put simply, these are tools (religion) that many use to prop us their illusions of security and control. People are afraid of uncertainty, afraid of the future. These institutions, these structures and ideologies, are all a vain effort to create some sense of certainty and security where there isn't any. Systems cannot provide you security, only I can."

"Grace doesn't depend on suffering to exist, where there is suffering you will find grace in many facets and colors."

"Guilt will never help you find freedom in me. The best it can do is make you try harder to conform to some ethic on the outside. I am about the inside."

"Faith does not grow in the house of certainty."

"If I take away the consequences of people's choices, I destroy the possibility of love. Love that is forced is not love at all."

"It should be very freeing to know that you can offer us nothing, at least not anything that can add or take away from who we are..."

"Those who are afraid of freedom are those who cannot trust us to live in them. Trying to keep the law is actually a declaration of independence, a way of keeping control."

"My words are alive and dynamic - full of life and possibility; your's are dead, full of law and fear and judgment. That is why you won't find the word responsibility in the Scriptures."

"And beyond that, because I have not expectations, you never disappoint me."

"Mack, I don't want to be the first among your list of values; I want to be the center of everything."